Wonderfully described definitions

[lionking]

Wow.....What an amusing way of defining such terms...................

Wonderfully described definitions.........



CIGARETTE:

A pinch of tobacco

rolled in paper

with fire at one end

and a fool at the other!



MARRIAGE:

It's an agreement wherein

a man loses his bachelor degree

and a woman gains her

master



LECTURE:

An art of transmitting Information

from the notes of the lecturer

to the notes of students

without passing through the minds of either



CONFERENCE:

The confusion of one man

multiplied by the

number present



COMPROMISE:

The art of dividing

a cake in such a way that

everybody believes

he got the biggest piece



TEARS:

The hydraulic force by which

masculine will power is

defeated by feminine water-power!



CONFERENCE ROOM:

A place where everybody talks,

nobody listens

and everybody disagrees later on



ECSTASY:

A feeling when you feel

you are going to feel

a feeling

you have never felt before



CLASSIC:

A book which people praise, but never read



SMILE:

A curve that can set a lot of things straight!



OFFICE:

A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life



YAWN:

The only time when some married men

ever get to open their mouth



EXPERIENCE:

The name men give to their Mistakes



DIPLOMAT:

A person who tells you to go to hell

in such a way that you actually look forward

to the trip





OPTIMIST:

A person who while falling from EIFFEL TOWER

says in midway "SEE I AM NOT INJURED YET!"




MISER:

A person who lives poor so that he can die RICH!




FATHER:

A banker provided by nature



BOSS:

Someone who is early when you are late

and late when you are early



POLITICIAN:

One who shakes your hand before elections

and your confidence later



DOCTOR:

A person who kills your ills by pills,

and kills you by his bills!



"It's not WHAT You have in your life,

but WHOM You have in life that counts"